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« on: November 19, 2008, 10:07:14 pm »
The Final Lesson
All right, sit down. You know, that’s the last time I’m gonna get to say that? Until the next crop comes through, that is.
I’m still going to call you all rookies, though.
That’s right, after today, you all graduate. You will receive a certificate suitable for framing and a license to operate as a bounty hunter anywhere the SSPB has jurisdiction. Which, for the record, is everywhere. But before that, we have one more lesson: the city-states of Mars.
There’s a big debate amongst the Venetians and the Martians as to which planet was settled first. The French, they claim Venus was the first, but near as we can tell, when the Great Migration came, settlers headed to Mars.
And what a shithole they made, too. No way to terraform Mars, not any more. Instead, people live, work, work, die, and work inside big environmental domes. Did I mention they work?
Yeah, Mars has government. They have lots of them, one per city, actually. But what they also have are a whole bunch of corporations that have all set up business on the planet. Why you might ask? Well two reasons. One, the Martian work ethic. Never met a Martian who cared much for trinkets or fashion or the finer things in life, but they go crazy for anything that might make them more productive.
The second is because Martian law lets anyone dump toxic waste into craters on the planet surface and they never pay a fine.
This, however, has lead to a major Martian industry: smog farms. Carbon from the pollution and the planet’s surface is mined by Martian farmers to make synthetic fuel and plastics.
So why do you mighty bounty hunters-to-be care about Mars? Well, think of each Martian city-state as its own urban sprawl, complete with its own organized crime. Hard to tell if it’s the all the people or the crime families, but if you need to make some money fast, I’m sure there’s a job to be found on the red planet.
Two more things I’ll tell you rookies and then you can get out of here. First, people on Mars, they carry guns and they know how to use them. If you do not come correct to a Martian, you better be able to dodge bullets.
Oh, and the other thing. Watch your prey. Find his weakness. Shoot straight. Come home alive.
Now, get out of here. The Universe is yours.